Going home for christmas
After a lot of back and forth Flo and I decided to go home for christmas – again. We actually had planned on not doing that anymore for a few reasons, but recently we both more and more become cool with the idea of visiting our old home again. A few reasons spoke for going back for christmas, but the strongest ones were definitely seeing our friends and family. I have been a little homesick lately and really need some quality time – other than on Skype – with the people I love most. Another factor is that a lot of our friends are having babies recently. This is one of the really hard sides of moving away from home.
When we first moved here my brother already had two kids and it really broke my heart to leave Germany with the knowledge that I won’t really see those two grow up. Missing people and missing out on milestones like that is something you try to prepare yourself for. But you can’t really imagine how hard it is to really be away and miss everything. One of our really good friends for example just had her baby a few weeks ago and it still breaks my heart that I never actually saw her pregnant. I actually saw her last christmas, but at that time I didn’t know she was pregnant yet. This christmas we will see her and her husband as parents with a few months old baby. We will see our friends in a totally different stage of their lives. And we weren’t able to accompany them on the way there.
I am more than happy to see that all our good friendships in Germany are still going strong and I am sure they will still be in a few years – even with us being thousands of miles away. But it still makes me feel a little guilty that I am not there for my friends. Not in the good times, not in the hard times. And this is why I am going home for christmas. To make at least a little up for the time I missed and enjoy slipping into my old life again. Only for two weeks – but still.