Archive for the ‘Lessons to learn’ Category

Flo and I very rarely have those weird days on which we are kind of unsure, if this is really our life or if it is just another vacation. Today was one of those weird days. After helping our friend Scott move into his new home, we went to Whole Foods to grab a bite to eat. We sat on the Patio in the sun and ate and suddenly Flo said: “I just had the feeling that we are gonna fly back home to Germany soon and I am just here on vacation.” He actually spoke from my soul, because at that exact moment I felt exactly the same.

I think I have those days more often than he does. But for me it’s not only those moments that feel like vacation. I also have those what I call “thinking mistakes”. I for example think about something I wanna tell my parents about and will weirdly say to myself: “Don’t call them, you can just tell them when you get back home.” This happens to me every now and then and always leaves me kind of confused. I don’t know where those moments come from. Maybe, because I already adapted to my new surrounding so good that it is too fast for my brain? Or maybe it’s those moments where I miss my family and friends the most.

But no matter what it is, every time I have this feeling I am super relieved when I realize this is no vaction. It is my new life!

Flo and I have been on our little german vacation for a little over a week now. I waited till now to write this first “german” post to be sure about my feelings for Germany. But now – after a week – I can honestly say: Moving to the US was the best decision I made in a long time. For sure I am beyond happy to see my family and friends, but I can’t say the same about Germany. Actually I am a little disappointed. I expected to come back to Germany and at least be a little nostalgic. But no, I am actually a little annoyed. And I already miss my new home LA.

I know that it’s a good sign that I miss my new home and not my old one. But I honestly never expected to feel like that about the country I lived in for the first 28 years of my life. Maybe it’s because I’ve just lived in the US for a little less than a year. But I feel like I found the place where I should be (at least for now). I think I never wrote about this, but since we moved to the US I feel way more comfortable, happy and relaxed. In Germany I always somehow felt pressure. To succeed, to do better or only to look better. That is something that I haven’t felt in a long time now. That’s probably, because we are successful in the US and because I fulfiled a lifelong dream of mine. But it makes me happy to see (again) that I have made the right decision.

With this knowledge I can enjoy my german vacation. But I also already look forward to go home! Home to the beach, home to our new friends and home to our new life. A new life which I honestly love!

Flo and I wanted to book flights “home” for christmas. Due to a few reasons we couldn’t get ourselves to commit to 1. the huge amount of money we have to spent for it and 2. to really decide when to go. We promised our parents to come for christmas, so we were somehow getting under pressure! Yesterday we finally made the for us big commitment and booked flights to Germany. Let’s not talk about the money this 2 week trip will cost us. I will explain why booking the flights was such a big deal for us though.

Most of you might feel like “they have been away from their home for 10 months now, shouldn’t they look forward to visit”? We kind of do that, because we for sure miss our family and friends. But on the other hand we just settled in over here. We have new lifes in the country we chose to live in. We have friends, daily routines and our home now is the US. It is kind of hard to leave all of this behind. Even if it is just for two weeks. Another thing is: I never loved christmas that much, but the american christmas spirit is awesome. We went to Target yesterday and seeing all the cute decorations and stuff they sell nearly made me cry. This christmas Flo and I will totally be stuck in between two worlds. We will not be in our new home to set up a christmas tree, hang up the little christmas boots on our fireplace and eat tons of candy. But also we will not be home in Germany long enough to enjoy all this either.

It feels weird to know that we are gonna leave today in 5 weeks. I am a little afraid that it might be too early for us to go back home. But at the same time I know that I will miss our new home, too. Maybe it will be a nice late christmas present to come back to the country we chose and love to live in! And also be able to see our families and friends at home!This christmas will definitely be different than all the ones before. But as we learnt a million times in the last year: Different can be a lot better than you expect it to be!