It is officially Winter in Southern California. This past week has been extremely cold with temperatures as low as in the 30ies (°F). And what can I say: It got me sick! When we went back to Germany in December, I got sick literally when stepping out of the plane. I thought coming back here I would be able to soack up some sun and enjoy a nice warm winter in Southern California again. But that plan didn’t come true, since it was super cold, our whole office went sick and I caught a cold once again.

Sometimes I really have to laugh about myself, because I became so American/Los Angeles already. I consider everything below 50°F really cold and wear my Winter Coat when the sun outside is beaming and my old german self would have enjoyed a nice and warm sunny day. Another thing that I consider very American by now is getting sick easily. Considering the amount of sick/vacation days we have in my office, I find it astonishing how often my colleagues get sick and with what kind of sicknesses they stay home.

Tomorrow I will have to take my first sick day of 2013, which makes me kinda mad since I am very german and hate to miss a day at work. But in order to get healthy again – especially in this cold weather – I need to get some rest. The forecast says that it will get a little warmer soon, which I pray for. I want to spent my free time at the beach, in the sun, enjoying what I love so much about Southern California! And not sick in bed with a cold – how unglamouros does that sound for someone who lives in Southern California?

In my first months in the USA I was terrified to be alone with an American. Not alone like being in the elevator with someone. But alone like in the car with someone or alone getting lunch with a colleague. I was always afraid to not being able to understand that someone, not being able to keep a conversation going or just afraid of talking weird english. I was equally terrified to meet new people.

I don’t know when it happened, but this week I realized that I haven’t felt like this in a long time. If I get to drive one of my colleagues home after work, I actually enjoy the conversation and don’t even think about how my english might sound. Also meeting new people is no longer a stressful situation, but a really nice and exciting thing to do.

I actually believe that this kind of makes the US more home to me than a comfortable apartment for example can. Because without feeling comfortable speaking a new language and without being comfortable talking to the people that surround you, I don’t think you can call a place home! At least to me the fact that my panic mode is no longer turned on means the world! And it also makes me feel proud. Proud of being able to say I let my guard down and through that not even gained a whole lot of confidence, but also new friends!

The most prominent thing that comes with living in a foreign country is for sure your accent. When we first moved her it pissed me off a lot that everyone asked us where we were from after we said a single sentence. Even the staff at Starbucks knew we weren’t american after we ordered a damn coffee. It took me some time to get along with this, but after a few weeks I kind of forgot about my accent.

I already told you that the language hasn’t been a real problem for us, but that we still have our moments. I have learned the hard way that the more you think about your accent and the way you talk, the worse it gets. So with time I kind of stopped fighting with myself, just talked and it got so much easier for me. Another side effect is that the more comfortable you get speaking a foreign language, the less people notice that this language is foreign to you.

Noone asked us where we are from just because of our accent in a long time. And today, when we went to a BBQ, a woman we talked to even thought I was american. When I told her I was german she was a little shocked and said that she didnt hear an accent at all!

These little steps are definitely just tiny steps in the right direction, but they make me proud. And the best: They make me feel more comfortable with talking english.