From the beginning on I’ve been very honest with you about what I find hard about moving to a new country. My biggest fear and indeed one of my biggest struggles here in the US has been finding friends from the beginning on. I know that it is mostly my fault, because I might not be the most outgoing and easy person. But I didn’t expect it to be that hard to find some nice people over here.

Now – nearly 18 months after we first moved the US – we found some nice friends and have a good circle of close people. But it for sure isn’t the same as back home. We hung out with one of Flo’s new co workers and his girlfriend yesterday. I met them before and absolutely love them, but for the first time I really got to talk to them yesterday. When I talked to the girl alone, she told me how hard even she as an American has it to find friends in LA. She is from the East Coast and told me that she considers the West Cast as somewhat of a bad place to actually make friends.

When you move here you have to learn the difference of an actual friendship and a superficial nice gesture very fast. No, I don’t want to say Americans are superficial. I really don’t think that. They are nice and open – and Europeans might often misunderstand that. But you have to learn to not mistake a nice move as a friendship. And I guess that is what happened to me when we first moved here and often left me a little confused.

I guess the best tip I can give everyone who plans on moving here or just did so is take your time. Don’t think everything has to work out perfectly in the first years. Maybe you will be lucky and find friends super fast. But maybe you won’t – and that’s absolutely okay. Because you are building a whole new life for yourself – and you have to do that one step at a time.

Everyone who reads this blog regularly knows that Flo and I were really lucky in the US so far and didn’t have any serious problems during our 4th months in California. But still, even if anything seems perfect, living in a new country still has some hard sides to it. Even if you know what awaits you when you move to a new country, it sometimes hits you hard to have to cope with situations you didn’t have to cope with back in your home country.

For us right now the hardest thing is that we just aren’t american and we just don’t act like americans. That mostly shows when it comes to making new friends and finding people to hang out with at your work. Flo and I both had people starting nearly the same day we did at both our companies. And guess what: All these people by now are totally integrated and have friends. And we both still sit there alone and just don’t belong in. I don’t want this to sound wrong, it’s not that we feel like hated or anything. But you still feel that you are not american. And that people treat you like that.

We still enjoy life over here, wanna stay and now that we just have to deal with this for the next weeks, maybe months. But that is what it’s like when you decide to move somewhere new. It is hard, it had it’s downsides and you have to be strong. I don’t write this to scare anyone. And I still would tell everyone that has the chance to move somewhere new to do it. But please be aware that there are some hard times ahead of you. Be strong, endure it. And maybe (hopefully) you will be rewarded for it pretty soon.

There is one thing that everyone who lived in the US, would tell you: You will definitely learn to be more open while living here. And yes, I joined their club! We’ve only been here for two months now, but I already can tell that my behaviour when meeting new people totally changed!

Americans may be very ougoing, friendly and even superficial people. But that makes it so much easier to feel welcomed and to connect with other people. I was so worried that we might not get to know any people at all in the beginning. But as always in life fate just pulls you through. We were lucky enough to have the most welcoming and cute landlord for the first two months, who invited us to a weekly dinner party friends of hers are thworing. We went there for the second time yesterday. The first time we’ve been there was three weeks ago and Flo and I didn’t really connect with anyone. But yesterday it was different. We had so much fun, felt so welcome and met so many nice people from all over the world!

Since we’ve been here I’ve notived that it is so sad how we kind of avoided meeting interesting people when living in Germany. Sure, from time to time we met new people through friends in Cologne as well. But even after two months I met so many nice and wonderful people over here, that even that experience alone makes the whole emigration stress worth it!

So to everyone out there: If you are thinking about moving to another country (even if it’s only for a few weeks or months): DO IT! It will definitely help you to be more open-minded and friendly towards strangers. And who knows: Maybe it will get you some new best friends on top!